Relationship Tips: Sleeping Position May Reveal a Lot about Your Marriage

August 19, 2015 by

When the lights go out and your eyes fall shut, your subconscious mind springs into action. That’s why sleep can reveal quite a bit about our personalities. For instance, sleeping in the fetal position suggests a tougher exterior with a shy and sensitive exterior, while sleeping on your side with your arms and legs straight suggests a trusting nature.

Accordingly, you can tell a lot about a relationship based on the body language of two partners who are sleeping in the same bed. The sleeping positions of you and your spouse or partner may reveal a lot about your feelings towards each other and the roles you play in your relationship.

Intrigued? Read on to learn more about some of the most common sleeping positons among couples, and what they can teach us.

Tight spooning. About 18 percent of couples report sleeping in this position, which involves one partner holding the other tightly from behind. In the tight spoon, one partner takes a protective position, while the other takes a trusting stance. This position also suggests sexuality, and is more common among newer partners.

Loose spooning. As relationships mature, couples may adopt a looser spooning position, which still suggests trust, while allowing both partners to sleep in a way that may be more comfortable.

Tangling. This is an intimate position where two partners sleep face to face with their limbs intertwined. This one is more common among new couples, or after intercourse or strong emotional interactions. While sleeping in the tangled position is fine initially or on occasion, always sleeping in this manner could suggest over-dependence.

Chest rest. Common with both new and rekindled romances, this position involves one partner resting their head on the other’s chest. It suggests protection, trust, and companionship.

Pursuing. When one partner sleeps on one side of the bed, the other may try to pursue him or her by moving closer. This position could mean that the person who has moved away is enjoying being pursued, or that he or she wants more space in the relationship.

Apart. For 27 percent of couples, sleeping in opposite directions on opposite sides of the bed is most natural. While sleeping apart may seem to suggest distance, studies have found that couples who sleep in this way are both intimate and independent.

Monopolizing. A partner who monopolizes the bed, leaving the other with little space, this could suggest an unbalance. It suggests that the dominating partner may tend to act self-interestedly, while the other is taking a submissive role.

To find out more about what you and your partner’s sleeping position says about you and your relationship, talk to a Portland relationship counselor. A counselor may be able to provide you with insightful relationship tips to strengthen your bond based on your unique sleeping style and other information about your experiences, interactions, and behaviors.