Facebook Can Cause Relationship Problems for Those with Low Self-Esteem

March 12, 2012 by

Relationship problems caused by a lack of attention can serious issues, but sometimes one partner may have unrealistic expectations. No matter how diligently their partner has worked to express his or her love, it just doesn’t seem to be enough. The attention-seeking partner always has some new fear about why things are going badly. It is normal to need attention. Insecurities, however, can turn a normal need into an exaggerated need. Exaggerated needs can wear on relationships.

Portland marriage counseling is especially helpful for you if you have struggled with insecurities, or an insecure partner. You have probably been trying to solve the wrong problem. Often the issues aren’t stemming from a lack of affection or attention in the relationship – rather, the attention-seeker’s low self-esteem is causing him or her to worry over things and find fault the second their partner’s attention isn’t laser-focused on them.

How Facebook Can Make Relationship Problems Worse

Facebook and other forms of social media can be especially troubling for this kind of situation because they are all about how much attention you can get. Some people break down because their spouse didn’t like their last update or comment on the picture they just put up. Worse, it allows them to cyber-stalk their partner and see what he or she has been doing. Heaven forbid if they interacted with anyone else on the social network when they haven’t reacted to the attention-seeker’s activity.

I’m not trying to blame Facebook for these relationship problems. I do believe, however, that it facilitates the problems and exacerbates it by giving people more things to focus on and obsess over. For clients dealing with this kind of issue, I recommend limiting their time on Facebook and other social networks while working to overcome their insecurities and making sure that their partner understands the issue so that they can be more understanding and supportive.

If you believe you are struggling with low self-esteem or an attention-seeking partner, I encourage you to seek Portland marriage counseling for help with your relationship problems.