An experienced and qualified marriage counselor knows that most couples do not start marriage counseling until their marriage is in peril. Research shows that most couples should have started marriage counseling seven years earlier. There is a significant number of couples that enter therapy believing their marriage is “too far gone” to save and they [...]

Even a marriage counselor in Portland, Oregon can be guilty of too much bickering, one of the most unpleasant of relationship habits. Recently on a vacation with my spouse we reflected on how we no longer bicker. (Actually he said we do so bicker, and I said we do not.)
It got us to talking about [...]

A recent New York Times article by Tara Parker Pope, author of The Science of a Good Marriage, explores fidelity research and the commitment or “fidelity gene”.  Marriage counseling has long sought to prevent affairs. Pope concludes with the concept of Self-Expansion as a kind of commitment glue. The idea is pretty basic, sounds obvious [...]

Marriage Education is often viewed as not being romantic, that the presentation of facts and the discussion of issues doesn’t lend itself to being a romantic pursuit. This marriage educator begs to differ.

When a Man Hears “Not tonight honey…” he hears, “I don’t care about you”. A dilemma that marriage counselors have long observed. In the male brain, sex does equal love. Drop your judgments about how men see sex and learn to be more open to your man’s love language.

Neuro-psychiatrist writes a new book, The Male Brain, that examines and explains how and why men see sex the way they do. There are significant differences in the male and female brains, and a marriage counselor regularly runs into the problems this difference creates.

In marriage counseling we see that the biggest mistake couples make in their communication is blaming one another. Imago Relationship theory takes this one step further and asks us to stop all blame, shame and criticism.  When I first heard this I wondered if I was ever going to be able to talk to my [...]

Maybe you, like millions of Americans, have joined the audience of the new television show, The Marriage Ref. Although a specialist in marriage counseling, I haven’t watched the show and I mixed feelings about the premise. As a marriage counselor I do not usually see couple’s problems as a laughing matter.
However, I did read a [...]

As a marriage counselor I am always on the lookout for books that my clients can find useful. Two such books I have learned about lately may be of interest to my clients with young children.
Let’s Stick Together: the Relationship Book for New Parents is about to be released and is written by Harry Benson. [...]

“Marriage counseling was the best thing we ever did”, exclaimed a client of mine when I noticed he and his wife sitting at a table in a local restaurant.  I had just popped in for lunch and noticed them looking my way. I wanted to respect their privacy, but they were eager to talk. They [...]

As a marriage counselor I have seen the negative impact of unwanted weight gain on relationships many times, for both men and women.  You may be able to relate to the loss of self-esteem if you aren’t happy with your fitness or appearance. Once your self-esteem is lowered, your libido can go with it.  Poor [...]